“Do you love me enough that I may be weak with you? Everyone loves strength, but do you love me for my weakness? That is the real test.” –Alain de Botton
“So This Is Love?”
She sat by the window one rainy afternoon after school, thinking, “What is love? How does it happen? How do you understand that you’re in love?” She quietly thought to herself with no answer to what ‘love’ actually really meant.
Saturday, August 1st it was a really beautiful morning when Violet’s mom came in the morning to wake her up. “Violet wake up, it’s time for your tutor class”, she said with a smile while pulling the blanket off her. “Mom give me 5 more minutes I still have lots of time,” exclaimed Violet as she tossed herself in the blanket again and gradually fell asleep. After 5 minutes she got up and got dressed to go to class. When she arrived she saw all her friends sitting down smiling at her. She waved at them back and quickly took the seat beside them as her teacher was taking the attendance. All her friends would talk about how they would simply find this and that guy cute. Violet would just listen, not giving any attention to them. A lot of boys in Violet’s tutor class had a crush on her, they would leave notes on her desk or just email her requesting to be added on “MSN”. She really didn’t mind she would just didn’t add them or accept them. Violet’s friends would always make fun of her by saying how she was afraid of “LOVE” or allergic to the word. Violet would just laugh at it off and not to take it personally. When the teacher heard them he said, “One day Violet will also fall in love and the whole world will be inspired by her love story.” Violet stared at the teacher and also thought to herself about what he said. She thought about it while laying on her bed in the night time after coming back from class. That night, before going to bed Violet made a small prayer, but didn’t know that small prayer would change her life forever.
The next morning, Violet parents decided to take a small holiday back to her hometown in “Norway” Violet was so excited but at the same time really upset, she was in sixth grade, it was her first year of middle school and all her friends were in her class, but she was leaving them to go for a vacation. The next day it was September, 10th it was the day of her flight. She got on to the plane and sat beside the window thinking how everyone will react seeing her after so long especially now that they also have a new member in the family; her little brother. She finally landed in Norway, all her family from her mother’s side came to pick them up from the airport. She went home that morning and took a long nap because she was exhausted and of course, because of the jetlag. Everyone from her mother’s side came to see her which made her feel very uncomfortable. Later in the afternoon, her aunt from her father’s side came to see her she was feeling so nervous and scared. However, a few moments later, she saw a guy hiding behind her aunt she whispered to herself “Zachary” as he looked right back at her. And he also whispered her name “Violet”. That’s when everything stopped and became blurry for her. She forgot about her friends, about everyone back in Canada, she also forgot about the “cute guy” in her class. Her whole world was being recreated. Violet was feeling so happy that she ran to her uncle’s room and started to scream and dance. As days past, she started loving her vacation more and more. She didn’t want to leave she was feeling so happy and alive.
Many days went by her love for her new life started blooming and she was very glad that she got the chance to visit her hometown where she was born. She felt as if she belonged there. She had one more night before her flight the next day, this is the one night where everyone became sad, where her whole world felt like it was about to end. All of a sudden, Zachary asked her if she used any social networks and she excitedly answered “Yes, MSN!” she felt very jubilant, he was also very happy and asked her what her email ID was. Without any hesitation she told him her details and he teased her for having such a stupid email ID. It was the day of her flight, she was really upset that she was leaving everyone behind. Most of all she was leaving Zachary behind. As she landed in Canada she was so excited and wanted to let her friends know she was back. As she laid down in bed to check her emails on her laptop, she saw an offline message and a friend request. Someone had written, “Hi” to her which made her wonder who it could be. So she accepted the request even though on a normal basis she never accepts any message or request from anyone. She asked him, “Who is this?” When she saw it was Zachary, she was overwhelmed with joy that he actually added her. Days and night went by they talked for hours and hours without feeling bored, without feeling as if the conversation was forced. She loved his presence and simply loved talking to him every day. Little did she know that she was very slowly falling in love with him. And when she did figure it out, she didn’t know what to do. She couldn’t tell her friends or anyone because they would make fun of her. She kept it to herself for days until she couldn’t take it anymore and told him how she felt for him. As she told him, he refused her right away saying things like “this can’t happen between us”. She felt hurt. Things were starting to get awkward between them. He stopped talking to her for weeks because he had exams. Violet waited for him every day, and then one afternoon, around November 14th, it was a rainy day when he suddenly came online and messaged her to come online, after she went online she saw him waiting for her. That was the day when both their lives ended bittersweet. It was the day where they both claimed their love. It was the day he told her he had fallen for her too.
Their relationship went on for years and years, they talked everyday nonstop. They got even more and more close with each other. That’s when Violet finally realized she was fully in “love”. She started to love him more and more each passing day. In between, she also went back to visit Norway again. September 19th was the day when they both said to each other the three magic words, “I LOVE YOU” On September 20th, Violet got her first kiss from him. A kiss she can never forget. A kiss that changed her whole life in less than 30 seconds. She felt as if she was in heaven. She never really felt this happy in her life. She loved his company more than anything. Most of all she admired him dearly.
As time flew by, they got attached to each other deeply, but life had something else for them. Life had another twist for them, a twist that changed her and his life entirely. For being in a relationship for the last 7 and half years, mid-July 2015 was the end for them. An end which completely shattered both hearts forever. It was an unbelievable feeling for Violet. He was everything to her. He was that happiness to her, that no matter how much she tried to forget and move on she just couldn’t. He was her first and last “love”. That’s when she realized what love was, and whispered to herself everyday “So this is love?”
One beautiful night after many months of their love story, Violet was sitting on a porch and from above she watched Zachary place flowers on her graveyard. She had heard every word he said, “ Hi Violet, I know you aren’t here, but I can’t tell you enough how much I miss you everyday. I hope that you are happy wherever you are and that I will always love.” It truly was heart touching for her to hear. As she wiped her tears away, she whispered, “I will always love you too.”
There is none who understands you better than Allah. Seek His help and ask for the best. Only He knows what’s best for you.